Probing the tawdry lives of ancient Incans at Lima’s Museo Larco (NSFW)

The other night, Todd and I hung out with a group of our friends and the conversation—as conversations between close friends sometimes do—veered into smutty territory. Manscaping. Vajazzling. Roast beef. Granny hairs.

Making out with a dead guy, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Making out with a pan-flutin' dead guy, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

It’s human nature to be intrigued by such libidinal things. We’ve been lewdly giggling and gossiping since the dawn of civilization, at least as evidenced by the erotic archaeological exhibit at Lima’s Museo Larco.

For those not into the bow-chicka-bow-wow, there’s a stunning Incan and pre-Incan collection at Museo Larco.

Toothy mask, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Toothy Moche funerary mask, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Human sacrifice sculpture, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Human sacrifice Moche sculpture, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

You can spend hours examining intricately painted pre-Columbian pottery, attempting to decipher the lost meaning of complexly knotted Incan ropes, or contemplating the shameful loss of heritage items destroyed by Spanish conquistadors in their “extirpation of idolatries” binge.

Power of authority, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Rationalization of the transfer of rule, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Gold and silver, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Gold and silver blended in one Chimu bowl, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Or you can go for the T & A. Up to you.

Bored sex pottery, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

I bet she's thinking about potatoes, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Touching you, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Happy to be touching you, Salinar pottery, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

As for the erotic pottery, it mostly speaks for itself. All that seemed to be missing was a BDSM tableau and few frolicking Furries.

Showing the goods, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Showing the goods, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Consequences of sex, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

The bumpy consequences of sex, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Blow job pottery, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

Blow job pottery, Museo Larco, Lima, Peru

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